Friday, March 26, 2010
After receiving an e-mail from my "progressive" brother deriding those Evil Republicans and their opposition to the Enlightened Ones' HealthCare for the Proles Plan, I had to respond.
I'm a registered Independent, and my brother and I could probably agree on several aspects of health care that needed reform -- even on how to reform them.
But I'm in total agreement with the majority of our citizens who were outraged at the disgusting process by which this fraudulent legislation was forced on the country, and the appalling contempt and disregard in which the party in power holds the Constitution and the Bill of Rights. In my opinion, not only was this bill a naked power grab in and of itself, the majority party was ready to disregard the requirement to vote on the bill and just announce it to be "deemed as passed" if they couldn't actually muster the number of votes they needed. Lenin and the Bolsheviks would have been so proud!
Therefore, in retaliation against his derision of the several state lawsuits opposing federal mandates forced upon their citizens (ironically, the same number as colonies who declared their independence from tyranny), I sent him this:
"KLUMBUS, UHA'A -- L. Rand W’Busch, noted local photographer and progressive activist, died of his injuries today, days after IRS agents raided his upscale home in trendy German Village. IRS agents said what began as a routine inquiry for back taxes on Mr W’Busch’s hearing aid and reading glasses turned ugly when he apparently resisted. 'He grabbed for something and we opened up on him with our new tactical shotguns,' the lead agent said. He added, 'These be way cooler than the s--- we had to, um, uh, find when we was in the ‘hood!'
His wife, sobbing uncontrollably, exclaimed, 'We love Obama and we’ve always been Progressives. We thought we were exempt from the fees and taxes on medical devices. We didn’t know the exemptions were only for government workers and politicians.' In a statement released shortly after the raid, she countered the IRS agent’s claim of alleged resistance by her husband, she said, 'He was reaching for his hearing aid on the coffee table, not a weapon. We hate guns! He couldn’t hear the IRS agents announcements.'
The agent countered by saying that they had received a tip from an informant about a sling cleverly disguised as a bosun's chair on L. Rand's boat on Lake Erie. That began an investigation into medical device trafficking across the Canadian border to evade registration and taxes. 'Just a small step to unregistered guns from there,' the agent stated.
The agents also explained that they had been monitoring communications between L. Rand and a couple of reactionaries about their suspicious "annual get-together involving other boats and small aircraft" in north Florida. They had been placed on the Watch List after the Holder Justice Department announced expansion of the 'warrantless wiretap' to include domestic internal calls.
When asked about her future plans, the agent interjected, 'She don’t have none. We takin’ the house, the cars, the boat, everything. They bein’ confiscated for back taxes on all they medical devices. Got a boat, and they don’t be payin’ they fair taxes on medical devices?? Progressives, my ass!!'
Ms W’busch hoped she might be able to stay with relatives temporarily, but another heavily-armed agent interrupted, saying, 'No free rent. There’ll be taxes on imputed income – and we’ll be coming for that, too. We may even decide to confiscate the relatives property for aiding and abetting tax evasion!'
L. Rand succumbed after a long wait for medical care for his injuries due to the doctor shortage, and an administrative error in his government insurance paperwork that couldn’t be resolved in time due to the SEIU slowdown over too few holidays for government workers. A government hospital bureaucrat commented, 'We’re sorry we couldn’t get him in to the emergency room, but there were already more deserving patients ahead of him who hadn’t been seen. Besides, he’s probably better off. He was approaching Medicare and Social Security eligibility and was on the verge of becoming unproductive and needful. We just can’t afford these people anymore.'
According to friends who asked not to be identified for fear of reprisals by federal operatives, he whispered to his wife, 'I love you' as they waited outside the government hospital in the rain. Then, struck with a convulsive spasm, he yelled 'F**K THOSE REPUBLICANS!!' and lapsed into a coma."
I love and admire my brother. Yet I cannot understand the blindness from which he suffers in viewing the Marxist elitists that infest this administration and Congress, and the damage they are inflicting on our freedoms, our rights, and our Constitution. I hope one day he'll wake up and understand, before it's too late.
